God is so good

Monday, the boys and I were involved in a really bad car accident. I've repeated the details over and over and don't feel like typing them out, but it was very scary. The van is totaled.

Today, thinking back over it, I feel more emotional than I think I did even at the time. I keep going over all that I woulda, coulda, shoulda done to prevent it and thinking about how it could have been so much worse than it was. I know I can't change what happened, though, and I am focusing instead on God's hand of mercy on Russ, Rand, me, Judson and the other man involved.

I have the image of our smushed van on the wrecker. Seeing the back so squished was very scary. I am so thankful that the boys were sitting in the middle seats because if they had been in the back, one of them would have been seriously injured and maybe even killed. God sat them exactly where He wanted them.

Russ was drawing in a notebook when we were hit. Both his window and the window in the backseat exploded from the impact. But, they exploded out and the glass that came in barely touched him. He had a few small cuts on one hand. His notebook flew out the window and landed about 6 feet from the van. He was buckled up so it wasn't him that flew out. He had flip flops on and had taken them off in the car. He couldn't find them when we were jumping out of the van, but he didn't step on one piece of that sharp glass.

The initial impact was on Rand's side of the van and the panel on the sliding door came off, but instead of hitting him, it must've hit the seat and just bounced back.

When I first got out of the van, I was disoriented (turns out, my glasses had flown off and I didn't realize it) and couldn't find my cell phone to call the police. One of the witnesses pulled his out and called for me while I searched for my phone.

The other witness was an 8th grader that had been walking home from school and he was so concerned about the boys. At one point, I looked up and he had an arm around each boy in a kind, protective manner. Randall had been crying, but he calmed down and waited on the curb with him.

Both boys got out quickly and obediently and stayed with the middle schooler, Eric, while I went back and forth from our car and the other car. Then the PE coach from the boys' school happened to be driving by, recognized Russ and Rand, and came over to stay with them, too, while I dealt with the police, firemen and paramedics.

I was able to get a hold of Slade quickly and he was able to come right there. Everyone involved in the accident walked away with nothing more than a few bruises, bumps or scratches. It was absolutely amazing.

Monday evening, I was thanking God for His protection and I was hit with an overwhelming gratefulness that everyone was safe. I have friends that have lost children--some while pregnant, some at delivery and some after years of living and loving. I know that God is always with me and that He gives us the strength to deal with the trials He allows in our lives... I know that and believe it with all my heart. But, I am... so thankful that God did not ask me to continue on without one of the boys. I don't deserve His grace or His love or His protection, but I am so, so thankful for it.

And I have seen God's love shown to us through so many friends and family the last few days. The boys' coach offered to go pick up dinner for us so I didn't have to worry about cooking. I was going to decline, but I was so thankful for the offer and her kindness. Russ started to put in a request (silly kid--he's the one that loves to eat out any chance we get), but I told him that Coach Floyd would bring whatever she choose. She laughed and leaned over and said, "What sounds good to you, Russell?" She was just wonderful.

We got phone calls and e-mails and tons of Facebook messages from so many people that have rejoiced with us, encouraged us and prayed for us. Thank you to each one of you; it means so much to us.

Yesterday, we heard a knock on the door and it was one of the ladies I served with in the Evening Women's BSF class last year. She brought by dinner for us. Totally unexpected. And, not just any dinner, but spaghetti sauce from Monjuni's--my all-time favorite Italian restaurant in Shreveport. Slade and I had been planning to go to Shreveport last Saturday to celebrate my birthday, but it ended up not working out. So, God used Jane to bring a little bit of Monjuni's to us. God cares about the little things.

I did go to my doctor to make sure Judson was okay and that I hadn't jump-started labor. And, gosh darn it, I hadn't. My babies just don't come until we make them. But, I really am thankful that it didn't start my labor because that would have been very stressful and scary and probably hard for the boys to prepare for, too.

I am feeling emotional and a little down today and I'm sure it's just the pregnancy hormones mixed with the emotions of all that has happened. When we drove past the accident scene the next day (the accident happened just seconds from our house, so we pass the spot often), I told the boys that we had a choice every time we drove past the scene of the scary accident. We could think about how scary it was and how sad we are that our newly-fixed van is gone... or we could remember how God protected us and kept us safe and brought people to help us. I think I need to take some of my own advice today. I've felt shaky as I drive and I feel like I'm missing things and am distracted. I told a friend I should probably take up bicycling for a while...

A sweet friend encouraged me to imagine the scene in the spiritual world as the accident happened. Angels everywhere manuevering each vehicle and each person. What a visual.

So, thank you all for your love and concern. We are all okay, not even very sore at all, and so, so thankful for God's protection and mercy.

And now to find a van. I told Russ he could tell his friends that his Mom wanted a new van, but his Dad didn't, so his Mom just decided to wreck the old one to get her way. *grin* I was totally kidding, but it made him smile. I wish I could've chosen which vehicle I was going to total because Slade's needs to be put out of its misery, while mine had just gotten fixed from the fender bender back in the summer. But, in all seriousness, I am just glad that the things can be replaced and the people, who cannot, are all okay.

God is so good.